Levers

When you start a journey to become healthier, somewhere along the way you’ll discover the importance of balance. And when you do, if you’re like me, you’ll probably fight it at first.

For those of us who have a perfectionist personality also usually comes the all or nothing attitude.

The more you learn about yourself the more levers you have to play with. Learning various ways to become healthier, physically, mentally and emotionally. It can and probably will be daunting.

You’ll go in full force, pulling down one lever to progress as much as possible, as fast as possible. This will inevitably bring another lever all the way up and cause imbalance.

No matter how coaches and teachers repeat it, us perfectionists stubborn people have to pull on a lever all the way down and get out of balance in order to learn. What matters is what we do with this new information and how we get back up and adjust the lever.

In my blog “Laser Focus” I slowly started to understand the concept of balancing thoughts and emotions. Since then, I read a book by Dr Joe Dispenza called “Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself: How to Lose Your Mind and Create a New One”.

It’s an incredible book that made me realize quite a few things about why we react and act in certain ways and how to find balance.

With time, we learn to pull and adjust each lever slowly, one at a time. It requires a lot of trying, failing, patience, discipline and most of all, self love.

This image shared by Dr. Nicole LePera is the best I’ve seen to represent the various levers to play with and find balance.

The Domino Effect

For a long time, I was happy doing my little things in my own little world.

Last year, after a few months on medical leave, I slowly started to open up. I felt like seeing old friends, making new ones and exploring the world. I was still cautious… sticking to comfort like velcro.

Earlier this year, I met someone that, without knowing it, provided THE key.

The key was LOVE and the door was ME. It allowed me to slowly open up more and more… to see people… to see myself.

After this happened, everything quickly started to fall into place. 

Overwhelming? Yes! Scary? Oh hell yeah! Refreshing? Fuck yeah!

I’ve learned a lot about myself since and my ego still shows up from time to time to say: “Why didn’t I figure this out earlier? Why didn’t anybody teach me all of this sooner? I’ve wasted so many years during which I could’ve worked on all of this!”.

Then my true self remembers one of Gandalf’s quote:

“A wizard is never late, nor is he early, he arrives precisely when he means to.”

Reality is, I was working on this all along. Working on me. I just didn’t realize it. Dominos were being placed in line behind that door. Once it opened, they just started falling one after the other and clarity started to set in, domino by domino.

Years of battle between me and my ego left markings on my back. Now, instead of fighting with my fears, I embrace them. I find courage, love, I move forward and finally show who I really am. It’s hard… but it’s fun.

I am out, sharing all of this with the world and the dominos will just keep falling forever. I have spent my life aligning them one behind the other without knowing it. Setting this path that is now laying in front of me.

“Not all those who wander are lost” – J.R.R. Tolkien

“All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us” – J.R.R. Tolkien

Two sentences that inspired the tattoos on my back and my chest. The tattoos represent a lot of who I am. Time, space, duality, fears, ego… The pieces I’ve discovered lately are balance, love, and awareness of the true self…

You are working on yourself every day. Whenever you face a challenging situation, embrace it. Learn from it. Grow from it. And then share what you’ve learned with others so they can benefit from your experiences.

Open up. Embrace your fears and find courage, find love. Courage to love yourself, courage to love someone and courage to live your life to the fullest. And believe me, you’re more ready than you think. Your ego and your fears are simply distracting you… blindsiding you. You have what it takes, you’ve got this! Get out of your comfort zone and charge!

“Don’t count the days. Make the days count.” Muhammad Ali

Writing and publishing this blog is scary as hell for me but let’s go! Embracing my fears, getting out of my comfort zone and finding the courage of pressing the publish button uuuuummmmmmmmm… Now!

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